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Let’s
get right to the point. Please let us know what’s going on
with you
and Roscoe
the Waffle.
I really don’t discuss my personal issues. I am bigger than
that. All I will
say is that we grew up together in LA, and his name is not really
Roscoe.
It’s Clarence. I am the real Roscoe. My mother always enjoyed
The
Dukes of Hazard. The waffle has no class.
What about
the youtube video he made with you dressed up like a
prostitute
gangbanger wearing a bandana printed karate belt? It was
kind of
funny. People say that is why you fled to Europe to do a tour
out there.
No comment.
Nothing?
(Roscoe the Chicken calls his
manager into the room and whispers. She then
tells
our crew that legally Roscoe is not allowed to discuss any matters
pertaining
to
Roscoe the Waffle and Roscoe the Chicken. (Apparently, Roscoe the
Waffle
has used the chicken’s name to start some sort of restaurant
chain.)
Roscoe, I
apologize. I did not understand the severity of the matter.
Can we expect
a Pay-Per-View event to squash the beef?
(Roscoe get’s up and
walks out. His manager enters the room and informs me
that
if I keep bringing up Roscoe the Waffle, they will leave for good.)
The
interview continues.
Introduce
yourself to our readers.
I am Roscoe the Chicken.
I’ve been called “The Greatest Mascot
Alive.”
I had nothing more to prove as a mascot, so I retired to pursue my
R&B singing career. You may know me now as the first platinum
artist
on CockAfella Records for my album, “ChickenHead.”
I love what the
mascot game did for me, but there isn’t any substance these
days. You see
mascots with a gimmick dance and a catchy saying. There is no respect
for the art form anymore.
Are you
enjoying the photoshoot?
This season is amazing. Their inspiration is genius-- what if the Fab 5
played for the University of Hawaii (instead of Michigan.) Who thinks
of this shit? It’s bananas. And how about that orange and
black Hawaiian
print..?! They took that from the famous wallpaper in the movie,
Scarface. It’s so hood, yet classy at the same time.
Yeah, I
noticed that. Color is big this season.
Well… growing up yellow, it’s hard not to like
color. Just because I’m yellow
people always think I’m ghetto. I hate that.
Don’t
worry about me, I have a yellow chicken as a friend. I love rap
music. What
was your favorite outfit from the line?
I didn’t know that this shoot was going to be so
risqué. My manager did
not inform me that I would be shooting without my pants on.
I’m big
in Europe, so I’m used to it. However, an advanced warning
would have
been appreciated. I loved all the tees. My favorite piece was the Sunset
Strip Crew. That thing is bullet proof. Like they say, ‘they
don’t make
things like they used to,’ but undrcrwn does. The quality is
amazing.
Thanks for
taking the time to do this interview.We wish you luck with
your legal
troubles, as well as your European Tour. We’re big fans.
Any last
requests?
Thank you.
Just one request...can you do anything about the bear? He’s
overtaken my
dressing room with his entourage. He’s been on his cell phone
the entire
shoot. He keeps talking about someone named Stansbury. Who the hell
is he talking about?
for
retailer requests contact crew(a)undrcrwneurope.com
phone: +49 69 373 083 72 or +49 69 373 083 73
fax: +49 69 373 083 74
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